Good Morning to all! Its Thursday’s with Sharon at Attain® IVF Customer Care and like many businesses we will be closed Monday, May 31 in observance of Memorial Day. (Can you believe summer is almost here!!)

Part of what we do as Customer Care specialists at Attain is to listen and offer suggestions on how to organize the “information overload” our callers have gathered over the course of their research and treatment for IVF. Along with appointments, tests and medications, there’s a ton of stuff to read, digest and to try and make sense of. The amount is enormous, the medical and technical terms confusing, and one could create a legal-sized spread sheet to house it all. (And we speak to those who have!) Phew, let’s take a deep breath.

So, let me offer this:

Be Prepared. Keep a notebook/folder with all your information. There’s also a great personal organizer called the IVF Companion. (www.ivfcompanion.com) This is a great way to get a handle on organizing all the information you will receive (and will help to reduce some of the stress, too.)

Be Well Informed. I’ve said it before, knowledge is power. So keep a running list of questions to ask. Review the list before your next appointment and see what question may apply that day. Do your research and stay up-to-date with fertility news by joining online newsletters and e-information groups. A great website for fertility information and family building can be found at www.attainfertility.com. You will find helpful tips on everything from the best foods to eat to fertility treatment costs and financing.

Have Support. Ask for help when you need it. Most Practices are sensitive to the emotional needs of their patients so ask to see if they have a support group or any other additional resources that may be helpful to you. Partners, family and friends can provide wonderful support, too. Be open to whatever is available!

Have a safe and restful Holiday weekend. Until next time, all my best.

About an hour from my house is a magnificent Victorian-style resort. They have miles and miles of hiking trails with stunning vistas, a mountaintop lake, seasonal ice skating, and golf to name just a few amenities. However, you’re not allowed on the grounds unless you’re a guest – and it costs upwards of $300/night. My humble budget doesn’t allow for a high-ticket overnight stay.

However, my friends and I have found a loophole. If you book a spa service at the resort, you’re considered a day guest and have free reign of the grounds. So about twice a year we plan a morning of hiking, we pick a scenic overlook where we stop to enjoy our bag lunch, and then spend the afternoon indulging in a spa service and all the spa amenities.

Last month one of my dearest friends and I treated ourselves just one of those days at as a mutual birthday celebration. Pure heaven.

After our daytrip, I became obsessed with how relaxing the piped-in spa music was, until it occurred to me that I could (and did) download similar music on my iPod. Now when I come home and am puttering around the house, I listen to my new-agey music. It takes me right back to my reflexology service (we Pisceans love to pamper our feet) and all the other wonderful spa amenities. I’m in love with my spa-inspired tunes.

Sure my friends and coworkers make fun of me. But I don’t care. I’ve found my Happy Place and ain’t nobody gonna kick me out of it. In fact, I’m playing it right this very moment.

So to all of you reading this: I wish you peace and tranquility, and the hope that you find your own Happy Place, whether you’re going through fertility treatment or simply trying to get through the day. It’s a wonderful state of mind.

There’s been a lot of discussion on our Facebook page over the last few weeks around the emotional aspects of being infertile. Your triumphs and challenges have touched all of us. Thank you for sharing.

In fact, you inspired us to seek out additional support. As part of our ongoing “proactive” theme during National Women’s Health Week, we interviewed Dr. Andrea Braverman, clinical psychologist at the Reproductive Medicine Associates of New Jersey (part of our Attain Fertility^TM Network, who provided the following self-care tips.

From everyday encounters to special gatherings and events, those coping with fertility issues frequently face uncomfortable questions from family, friends and coworkers about having a baby. Knowing how to respond and how much you are comfortable sharing isn’t easy.

From innocent comments made in passing by co-workers and the probing questions of relatives, to the pregnancy of a sibling or close friend, sometimes heading into social situations feels more like heading into a minefield than anything else.

“Needs change at different points along the way, and even from day-to-day,” explained Braverman. “By identifying your triggers and then making choices, you’re able to create boundaries that work for you. Healthy communication with your partner and with the people in your life is essential.”

While there are no pat answers or general rules to follow Braverman does have a few tips about how you and your partner can best handle social situations during your path to parenthood.

Step One:  What are you triggers?

While it’s impossible to anticipate every situation, there are certainly ones you can identify in advance that may leave you feeling vulnerable. Announcements of other pregnancies or births, baby showers, family gatherings, get-togethers with friends, and even staff vacation-time at your fertility clinic may trigger feelings of isolation or sadness. When you’re able to identify these triggers, you’ll be able to create a plan of action to manage them.

Step Two:  What are practical things you need to consider?

In an ideal world, you’d always be able to choose when and what you want to share. However, there are other practical issues to consider. You may need to let someone at work know you are going through fertility treatment if you have periods of time when you need to be late for work or when travel will not be possible. Ask to have a confidential conversation with a supervisor and explain the situation. By being proactive and clear you will avoid uncomfortable questions and confrontations.

Likewise, there may be times when it’s necessary to share with a family member or friend. For example, if you have a relative living with you, it will probably be necessary to share some of what you are going through.

Step Three: What do you want for yourself? What do you want for your partner?

Remember you are in a partnership. Trying to get pregnant isn’t just your story; it’s your partner’s, as well. What are your boundaries together? What is best for you as a couple? Decide between you how open or private you want to be and how you will respond to those awkward questions. And if the two of you are struggling, think about seeing a counselor who can help you navigate this journey in the healthiest and most positive way for you and your partner.

“You can’t do it all on your own, none of us can,” said Braverman. “The sooner individuals and couples seek counseling, the easier the emotional journey of trying to get pregnant will be.”

Thank you, Dr. Braverman, for your invaluable support!

It’s Thursdays with Sharon, the sun is shining here on the East Coast (we’re in New York, folks) and I’m happy to be connecting with all of you again!

Let’s get real here. We at the Attain®IVF Call Center listen to people who share their personal stories about infertility and the many different twists and turns the journey has taken. Everyone’s path is different, just as everyone’s life is different. No two are the same.

Our callers often share how they cope with infertility, given how their daily lives are a crazy maze of challenges and obstacles. (The reality is that most of us don’t have the time or means to book a Caribbean cruise or take a week off to de-stress whenever we need it… sigh).

So what do our callers suggest? They suggest listening to your mind and body and taking note. If the tension is building, take a 5-minute break to calm down. If the emotions are overwhelming, call a friend. The universal, underlying theme is you are taking care of yourself and yes, putting your needs at the front of the line for the time needed.

Self-awareness is power. Listen to that “little voice inside your head” and remember to acknowledge and trust it.

We at Attain IVF Customer Care enjoy speaking with all our callers. With our Attain IVF Programs, we can help you find the right path that is designed to reduce stress about how much it will cost and help ensure you have the greatest possible opportunity for success.

Please contact us at 1-866-968-7483 for more information.

Until next time, all my best.

As you know, we have a special theme during National Women’s Health Week on being proactive about your wellbeing and taking steps to optimize your ability to get pregnant.

Today we’re focusing on when it’s time to see a fertility specialist. If you answer “yes” to either of these questions, it’s time!

Do you suspect you may have a problem?
One of the critical steps in getting pregnant is to see a specialist as soon as you suspect that you or your partner may have a problem. The sooner you identify any issues and get treatment, the sooner you’ll be back on track towards pregnancy.

Do you meet the clinical definition of infertile?
Your age and how long you’ve been trying to get pregnant determine whether or not you meet the clinical definition of being infertile.

Last month we announced our Free Fertility Check that you can take to help identify whether or not you should have a consultation as well as steps you can take to increase your chance of having a baby. If you haven’t taken it yet, we hope you do today!