Yes, I’m an Infertile Klutz

Infertility is scary.

There, I’ve said it. There’s no way to spin it into a positive and there is no tap dancing around the bad stuff. If I tried to tap dance, I’d probably trip. I’m kind of a klutz.

Allow me to introduce myself.  I’m Stephanie. I’m the new Community Manager for Attain Fertility, a blogger more often known as Lawyer Mama and a recovering attorney. (The recovering part is important.) I’m also the not-so-proud wearer of the infertility badge. Oh, and yeah, I fall down a lot.

Eight years ago I was where so many of you are now. Wanting to have a child, not sure if I could, depressed, scared and hopeful, all at the same time.

I was lucky. My husband and I went on to have children. We have two beautiful little boys keeping us on our toes and teaching us more about love than we ever expected.

I want that miracle again.

So now, at an age closer to 40 than 30, I’m trying again. That’s a huge admission for me and not just because I’m still publicly insisting that I will never be older than 30. Trying again means opening myself up to heartbreak and loss all over again. The many miscarriages that still haunt me become impossible to ignore, the pregnancies of friends and family become milestones of joy and pain. Trying again is scary.

My husband and I have been trying for a little over a year now and it’s time for us to seek help. I’ll be sharing all that we go through and a bit about how we got here on the Attain Fertility Blog, Facebook and Twitter. I may share too much information about my cervical mucus, my secret addiction to home pregnancy tests and all of my klutzy falls, but I’m hoping that you’ll overlook that and keep coming back to share your stories and experiences. Together we can talk about infertility openly and honestly and create a wonderful community of support. We’ll get through the scary stuff together.