My father had surgery yesterday. He has never been sick before and, at the age of 70, he finally got his rotator cuff repaired. I told myself that I wasn’t going to cry…
My father has always been active. When he tore his left rotator cuff, it didn’t slow him down. He also didn’t want to get the cuff repaired. But, when he couldn’t lift his grandchildren anymore, he decided it was time to get the rotator cuff repaired.
My father had his surgery yesterday. As a physician, I always remain confident and positive for the patient. But, as a family member of a patient, I was anxious. What scared me wasn’t the fact that my dad was about to get surgery but the concern that my father was scared. He had never had surgery before. I know my dad tried to put up a strong and tough façade but I could tell he was worried.
So, as the family member who is also a physician, I tried to remain strong for my father’s sake. But, the fear that my father had on his face right before he was wheeled into the operating room toppled down my façade.
I have always said that the most compassionate doctors are the ones that have been a patient themselves or have loved ones that have been patients. As a patient undergoing IVF and as a family member of someone who has experienced the fear of surgery, I truly understand the importance of compassion for our patients.
When I take a patient to the operating room, I know that she is someone’s daughter, someone’s mother, someone’s sister, someone’s wife. I always make sure to take special care of all my patients as well as their loved ones waiting outside. After all, the patient has entrusted me with their life and their health and their family member is trusting me to take care of their loved one.
As my father was being whisked away to surgery, I wanted to say “take great care of my dad.” I wanted to say “He’s really special to me; please take good care of him.” But all I could do was fight back the tears and comfort my mom as she cried too. I won’t ever forget the look of fear on my dad’s face. That experience will continue to remind me to remain compassionate for my patients and their family members.
Dr. Lowell T. Ku, M.D. is a leading Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility specialist at Dallas IVF, one the nation’s premiere infertility centers. Dr. Ku clarifies the many confusing terms used in the world of Infertility using straightforward explanations.
